Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Fight Thru It(Contains graphic content. Read at your own risk)

A really scary morning. We felt like we were going to disappear. The anger, frustration and trauma is blocked. You feel like you have to fight thru a block (your stuck fight-or-flight mechanism), or you'll snap. The more you fight, the worse it gets.

Then, you feel almost like you're trapped. You in a maze and if you don't find your way out, you never will. Then, just as you feel like you'll black out you find an opening and fight your way back.

How often does this happen to you?

At times it feels like nonstop dissociating. It's like two parallel realities. You only want to focus on one thing and have some sense of relief. However, it keeps going. Is it because of a long time of nonstop dissociating (which means it's second nature)? Is it because your body chemistry is messed up? Or, is it due to something else?

You feel stuck and like you're an empty shell. Will anybody listen?

Now, it feels like we have some sense of balance again. At times though, we're still scared to go to sleep at night.

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