Another tough day of big bills and more. We're getting thru those. The parents say they're still willing to temporarily help with expenses as I get the new jobs. However, there's a struggle to maintain a sense of balance and not literally snap from anger and frustration. For much of the day we're screaming and fighting to keep a sense of balance. Flashbacks and other symptoms still happen.
Depression is still there as well. We'll NEVER go back on meds unless we have to. The last time we did that we ended up with two addictions, got no help for either one and then ended up doing our own 30-day withdrawl program. Would YOU want to go thu that? The last anti-depressant we were on made us feel like a zombie. The anger and symptoms are there. Despite that, just stay sedated? No thanks.
The full despair of trauma is hitting us hard. You have to face it as best you can. In the meantimes, my multiples, little kid and I rock back and forth and sometimes go out on the balcony to check the view.
It's not "abnormal". It's all part of healing.
Since there's no instant cure for trauma, how do you deal with it? Break it down into small increments so it feels "manageable".
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