Latenight Comments

How's your week? Up late tonight and catching up on some writing.

Every day is a real battle. We have to scream and fight to focus when we wake up. Then, we drink some glucose to try and feel some sense of balance. If we eat too late the night before, you wake up feeling run down. What's the right balance? We're still looking for it.

Then, it's fight symptoms all day long. We finally finished our move from Windows XP to 7. Much faster and smoother transitions between windows. Now it's back to job hunting and the other  stuff.

We still keep a weapon with us to feel safe. If we go into many stores with no scanners at the entrance, we'll take it in because hyperawareness is still there. Every other person is a psycho rapist that wants to rape us in the aisle and then  kill us. Odds are that's not really true. Then again, you have to protect yourself.

Every day we feel like we're getting bombarded with flashbacks. Our intuition says it's trauma flooding out. Which also means get it out in the most non-threatening way possible.

We're at home. No one else is here and the doors are locked. Despite that, we have a knife in the room because we feel safer with that. When we try to go to sleep, we keep a knife at the foot of the bed. Again, to feel safe.

Do you ever pass out from fighting symptoms all day? What helps you to keep going? For us, it's the fact that we literally have no other choice. If you don't, you'll fall apart.

What else are we supposed to do?